humor and kindness

•January 28, 2014 • Leave a Comment

with my birthday tomorrow, i had to go and get my driver’s license renewed.

the trip to the social security office was okay.  i had to get proof i had one, because it is required to get a Florida Drivers License, and i have no idea where mine is.  the waiting time was a bit long, but watching a toddler try to pick up his mom’s huge purse made for some comedy.  his antics made the time feel like it went faster than it really did.

the trip to the Orange County Controller’s Office was quick.  on the way, there was a homeless man in one of the blue striped areas designated for those soliciting for money (the homeless, for instance).  so, after getting a certified copy of my marriage certificate (needed to get a Florida Drivers License) from the controller’s office, i gave him a couple of dollars when i passed by him, again. it wasn’t much, but it would’ve been terribly unkind not to help, even a little.

So, yeah…
This is what they need from you to get a Florida Drivers License:  your social security card (or proof you have one) or a current W-2 form, a certified birth certificate, all documentation of any name changes, and two pieces of mail with your address on it (to prove your current address) and your current drivers license or a passport.
it almost felt like they wanted my first-born (i don’t have a first-born).

when it came time to produce my birth certificate and proofs of name changes, i decided to make a small story of it.

“Well, first, I was born.”
I produced my birth certificate.
“Then, I got married.”
I produced my first marriage certificate.
“Then, I got divorced.”
I produced my first divorce certificate.
“Then, silly me, I got married, again.”
I produced my second marriage certificate.
“But, damn, that didn’t work out.”
I produced my second divorce certificate.  By this time, the clerk was smiling.  
“Now, you’d think I’d have learned my lesson by now, but no…..” and I produced my third marriage certificate.  When she looked at me, again, waiting for more, I had to add, “That’s all for now.  Third time’s a charm.”

it wasn’t major comedy, but it was enough to lighten the mood in the room.  i heard a couple of giggles from others in the room and it made the clerk smile.  that made me feel good.

it never hurts to spread a little kindness, when you can, and it never hurts to make a person smile, when you can.  

 

 

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Listening to others…

•January 22, 2014 • Leave a Comment

Listening to others affirms them, blesses them, connects you to them, and let’s you harmonize with them.

Listen without an agenda. Listen without expectations.

Listen to the words.

Listen to the experience behind the words.

Listen to body postures and expressions.

Listen to emotional tone.

Listen without taking it personally.

Listening gets you out of your self-centered camp.

Listening is kindness. Enjoy listening to others

From
Buddha In Blue Jeans
An Extremely Short Simple
Zen Guide to Sitting Quietly
by
Tai Sheridan

I am a hypocrite

•January 15, 2014 • 1 Comment

This morning, while walking to work, there was this old guy at the bus stop that is across the street from the sidewalk I usually use.  The old guy was on the bench, sitting with his upper half laying on the bench.  He was shaking.  I thought, “Oh, it’s another homeless guy,” and walked on.
Several cars passed by before one slowed down, changed lanes, and turned into my work’s parking lot.  I thought nothing of it except that it was a little strange, but the security guard seemed to be taking care of the driver.  The guard and the driver, who had a cell phone to her ear, started looking over in the direction of the bus stop.  I thought that was weird, too.
When I got to them, I realized that the lady in the car was calling 911 to get an ambulance to the homeless man.  To her, it seemed like he was having convulsions.  I looked back over to him and by that time, he had fallen to the ground. He wasn’t.
Knowing he was going to get care and knowing i have no way to help, I continued on and went into work.
But, the image of that man, both shaking on the bench and then laying on the ground, won’t leave me.  Why didn’t I see something wrong when I first saw the man?
I could have crossed the street to see if he was okay.  I could have called 911, myself.  Why didn’t I do that?
Here I am, constantly saying we need to be charitable and caring and I did the exact opposite. I ignored him.
What does that make me?
That makes me a hypocrite.

Many More HD Pictures of Lee Min Ho in the SBS Drama Awards Venue

•January 14, 2014 • Leave a Comment

Many More HD Pictures of Lee Min Ho in the SBS Drama Awards Venue.

motivation vs action

•July 16, 2011 • 2 Comments

Motivations.
We all have them.
Action.
Motivation leads to action.
The intensity of our motivation is, generally, proportional to the intensity of our action.
The deeply motivated have the energy to create a lot of good…and a lot of bad.
The deeply motivated can work and create in charity and giving.
The deeply motivated can create violence, disaster and war.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with doing things when deeply motivated.
But some people misidentify their motivations, trying to make their actions look valid….even righteous.

To this day, I will never understand causing violence upon another (except in self-defense), especially for the sake of one’s religion.
I’ve been told that the death penalty is a form of justice, given to us by God.

Let’s get real.
The death penalty is basically a form of punishment that keeps society from having to pay to keep a criminal alive until his natural death.
In those instances, society has determined that it would benefit the community more to use the resources that would have kept that criminal alive for other things.
That’s a valid argument.

For some, though, the death penalty is also a form of revenge.
I have been witness to people claiming “Hallelujah” when they hear a death penalty has been executed.
This has made me sad because each and every time, these people claim to be forgiving and righteous, and yet they give into the motivation of revenge and claim justice to be served. Then, they turn right around and tell me that only God can judge them.
That is called hypocrisy and it bothers me.  It’s a personal thing. And my views on the death penalty should be (and might show up) in a different blog.

For now, I have something to say about recent events.

Recently, a person, who most of society feels is undeniably guilty of a crime that might have drawn the death penalty, was found, surprisingly, not guilty.
Yes, my jaw dropped when I heard the verdict.

But, what surprised me the most was how certain individuals in society have reacted to that verdict.

Some have taken it upon themselves to exact their own justice against the jurors of the case.
Those jurors are now in fear for their lives.
Be on alert, too, if you even remotely look like the accused.  There have been reports of attacks on women who are guilty of no crime except for the fact that they may bear some resemblance to the accused.
There is no excuse for this behavior, in any way shape or form.
There is no excuse for this behavior, at all.

Perhaps these people need to look in their scriptures a little more.

Generally, the scriptures (whatever the religion may be) propose treating your fellow man fairly.
Sometimes, it is even thought of as more humane, dare i say righteous, to treat others better than you might treat yourself.
That can be called charity.

The motivation for this, for some, is because God says it’s the way.
I can accept that.

I also say, your motivation should be that it makes you feel good about how your actions benefit others and how it makes you feel as a person.

In the case sited above, I’m not saying “forgive and forget.”  That eliminates your motivation.

Perhaps, though, today, as we want to exact revenge on people who judged someone differently than we would have, we should redirect our motivations in actions more positive and useful.
Perhaps, we should focus energies on charities or laws that help children and support the rights of our only future: our children.
Perhaps, if you feel the judicial system is flawed, you should work on changing that system.

Remember that society’s children are watching and learning.  So far, those children are learning that when things don’t go their way, violence is the way to go.

Oh, wait…my parents called that “a tantrum.”

Team IDIC

•April 15, 2011 • 1 Comment

cancer is a bitch.
helping to fight it is a bitch, too.

i’m so tired of cancer.

my mother died of cancer on my 32nd birthday.  she was only 51.
i had cancer (and am very lucky to have been able to successfully fight it).
friends have had cancer.  some have died.  some have not.
a good friend of mine lost her best friend to cancer this year.
an orlando icon of the dance arts, Kip Watson, just died from cancer this past week.  his memorial is today.

i volunteer for a local cancer patient advocacy group (Compassionate Hands and Hearts Breast Cancer Outreach).
i volunteer for the local Komen Race committee.
not being a scientist, volunteering for groups like these is about the only way i can help in the fight against this insidious disease.

it’s the only way i know to honor the memory of my mother…the memory of friends gone…the memory of people i don’t know who have fought and lost or are still fighting.

on May 20, there will be a Relay for Life at Lake Eola in Orlando.
with the recent death of Kip on my mind, i really want to build a team for this relay.
i envision recruiting local dancers, like those who performed in the Works of PURE Love benefit for Kip, and those who were his students, and those who part of the classical dance community in Orlando.
i envision recruiting my sci-fi and fantasy and role play friends, many of whom have been touched by cancer in one way or another.
i envision recruiting people from work, many of whom have a history with the disease.
i envision recruiting friends from facebook, even, who come from a variety of walks of life…a good portion of whom have also dealt with cancer is some form or fashion.

with that vision in mind, a dear friend came up with the perfect name for the team:  Team IDIC.
for those not familiar with Star Trek, the IDIC literally stands for Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.
it is a perfect description of who i wish to share the relay journey with:  a very diverse group of friends, all with one goal in mind (to help, in some form or fashion, in the fight against cancer).

i hit a snag.
i started the process to register the team last night and stopped at where the registration process wanted $100 to register the team.

honestly, i just don’t have it.
i was expecting maybe a $25 fee (which i can handle), not $100.

so, now i wonder what to do.
the same friend who came up with Team IDIC is willing to donate $25 to help get the team going.
he is such a wonderful friend.

if i could get a little more help from a few more people, Team IDIC could become a reality.

so, i ask my friends this:  should i try to form this team?
if the answer is yes, then i need to ask for a little help.

i’m at rita@ritasworld.net .  please let me know if you can help.

this is ridiculous

•March 17, 2011 • Leave a Comment

how in the world can i gain 15 pounds in 3 months?

i live a gluten free lifestyle (which takes out all processed breads and pasta from my diet) and rarely eat dairy products (because both wheat gluten and diary cause all kinds of gastro-intestinal problems…dropping those have been a godsend).

maybe, i’m not active enough.  because my right knee and hip are causing a lot of issues, i’ve not taken a bellydance class in a while.  i haven’t walked around lake eola since the fall.

guess it’s time to ignore the knee and hip and get out in the world, again.

it’s also time to start the elevator pics, again.

so, today, Thursday, 3/17/11, i weighed in at 214.5 pounds.